Why?

Hmm... Its weird reading to what others are saying and doing now. I mean those who i've known from the past and also those of the present. Though I'm not quite sure what point am i trying to make, their mentalities (expressed in pictures and "about me"s they've posted) keeps me wondering. Some questions that I have for them, probably i should answer myself first. But i do think i'm very much thinking clearly, better than i was before (esp in high sch and college), but still, in the process of learning :)


Why do they say "i haven't" when they actually have? Don't they know it hurts in many ways? What if others do the same to them? How would they feel? Why do they lie bluntly without thinking of the guilt that might proceed afterwards? Why shower those who don't deserve with compliments? Why give credits to those who don't earn it? What are they trying to do actually? Crushing you by flattering with compliments? Do they expect the same reaction from you? Like to give them compliments also in return?


When i think back, why does the scenario seem so familiar, i realize, its high sch all over again. Growing older day by day doesn't mean you'll grow wiser too. To be wise it all depends on oneself. I think everyone in their stable mind knows that. Because i've seen those who are older than me with the mentality of a 14 year old. And its not because they have mental problems or anything close to medical mental conditions. They choose to live with the minds of a 14 year old. Perhaps they think its cute.... or something (I dowana say thing that might hurt others, wait scratch that. I think I already did).


There are loads of whys and hows and whats going through my mind as days pass by (esp nowadays). Maybe not just me, you too perhaps. When i start looking back to see how I was, and what I have become today... how what i did in the past result in who i am today. It crossed my mind that "How will i think of myself after 20 years, when i start looking back again? What will I be after this? Where will I be after 10 years?"


I know i'm not making any sense to you. But it does to me. Because its like a self-conflict thing. Anyways. Perhaps, i should now start looking at today AND tomorrow, before i turn back again :)



A m i r a h .